Wednesday, December 26, 1990 - Page updated at 12:00 AM

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How Corny Can You Get? Well, Try These Iowa Jokes

Well, when ya can't beat 'em, laugh at 'em. That's what they say in Minnesota - about Iowans.

Why in Minnesota? Who knows. It's just that for several years, football fans in those two states traded jokes, at each other's expense, whenever the season rolled around. Could be that they're next-door neighbors.

Anyway, those dear Minnesotans offered us, residents of Huskyville, some of their favorites. Some Iowans retaliated, as you'll see later.

So, tell these at your own risk:

-- When Iowans go to Pasadena for football games, they come into town for the weekend with a $10 bill and one pair of underwear, and they change neither.

-- What do you call an IQ of 76? Des Moines.

-- What do you call an Iowan with shoes? A preppy.

-- What's the only good thing to come out of Iowa? Interstate 35.

-- Do you know what Iowa stands for? I owe the world an apology (or idiots out walking around or I oughta winna round).

-- Do you know why Iowa has Astroturf? So the cheerleaders won't graze after the game.

Or you could try this one, for example, offered locally just to fit this year's Rose Bowl skirmish:

-- Why did the Hawkeye cross the road? He didn't. He backed into it, the same way Iowa got into the Rose Bowl.


Let's see. The folks in Minnesota offered yet more advice. They suggested we also run some Minnesota jokes, only change the name to

Washington - to temper things a bit, if you will, and to present a more balanced article. So for all you Iowa transplants, Cedar Rapids wannabes and just plain Husky haters, here are a few turnabouts:

-- Hear the one about the Washingtonian who was wearing a muffler to stay warm? Worked all right until someone started the car.

-- In Iowa, if people are told they have six months to live, they move to Washington where it seems like a decade.

-- What does it say on the bottom of Coke bottles in Washington? Open other end.

-- We heard that a Washingtonian cut a hole in his carpet so he could see a floor show.

-- Why did the Washington Legislature rule that light dimmers had to be moved from the steering wheel column to the floor board? Too many Washingtonians were getting their feet tangled up in the steering wheel.

Now aren't those special?

And you thought the only thing Iowa was good for was corn. . .

Copyright (c) 1990 Seattle Times Company, All Rights Reserved.


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