Hey champ, let's discuss this in the morning

Padraig, meet Postdrag.

Caroline Harrington was only two hours into a belated sleep when her hubby woke her at 6 a.m. Monday just to let her know he really, really did just win the British Open. "I said, 'I'm the Open champion,' " Padraig Harrington told the London Independent. "She was a bit like, 'I can't believe there's the trophy, but can we go back to sleep now?' "

Pass the cream cake

In case it escaped notice, Barry Bonds celebrated his 43rd birthday Tuesday.

And some of his muscles turned 7.

Just call him Otto

According to the Tampa Tribune, a local family named its first-born son after dad's favorite automaker and plus his No. 1 stock-car driver:

Chevy ... Dale ... Karr.

Matching gloves?

Super middleweight champion Laila Ali, 29, and ex-NFL receiver Curtis Conway, 36, got hitched last weekend.

No truth to the rumor she ditched the traditional prenuptial rehearsal dinner and replaced it with a weigh-in.

Up his alley

Two good reasons that Cubs pitcher Kerry Wood should like bowling:

• His fourth annual Kerry Wood Strike Zone Celebrity Tournament raised more than $275,000 for charity.

• And bowling doesn't have a disabled list.

Tony twist

Remember when Tony Parker was the Tony making NBA headlines — and not Tony Soprano?

Headlines

From Elliott Harris of the Chicago Sun-Times:

• On Laila Ali getting married: "Boxer gets a ring."

• On the mother of Matt Leinart's child all but calling him an absentee father: "Leinart fails a pop quiz."

Quote marks

• Reggie Hayes of the Fort Wayne (Ind.) News-Sentinel, after Marlins pitcher Scott Olsen led police on wee-hours chase to his home and allegedly kicked officers who tried to arrest him as he sat in a plastic chair in his front yard: "Unbelievable. He's making $380,000 a year, and he has plastic lawn chairs?"

• Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle, after Kevin Durant's agent said the 19-year-old Sonics rookie signed an endorsement deal with Nike because he has been with them his whole career: "His whole career? So Durant's been 'with' Nike since, what, preschool?"

• U.S. golfer Lucas Glover, to BBC Sport, after his opening-round 71 as an injury replacement at the British Open: "This is the icing on the gravy."

Alphabet scoop

Duke's football team enters the 2007 season riding a national-worst 20-game losing streak and a 9-72 mark over its past 81 games.

Making it the only school in the country to boast a Coach K and a Coach L.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com