All rise — and play ball!

It's that magical time of year when pitchers and their attorneys report to Capitol Hill, and the crack of the gavel will ring throughout the land.

Oh, yeah; spring training starts this week, too. And once again, baseball — the wondrous sport itself — will trump all of its dreary sideshows and self-destructive behavior of the performance-detracting variety.

Spring camps will be nearly as noteworthy for who won't be there as those who will. No Roger Clemens (trying to clear his good name, and now his wife's, too). And so far, no Barry Bonds (trying to stay out of jail, and find someone who wants to sign him, not necessarily in that order).

It will be the final spring for the Dodgers in Vero Beach and for the Indians in Winter Haven, before both teams vacate Florida and move to Arizona in 2009.

It will be, for the second time in four years — and the second time in 89 years — a spring in which the Boston Red Sox report as defending champions. The Sox will be going for their first repeat title since 1916, while the Cubs, ever optimistic, seek their first World Series championship since 1908, a cool century ago.

It will be a spring in which the Dodgers and Padres take off in mid-March for two exhibition games in China, and the A's and Red Sox take off at the end of March for two real games in Japan.

The major leagues will even have a new nickname in 2008: the Rays, who have dropped the "Devil" from their name, and, completely coincidentally, may well be on the verge of becoming a major factor in the AL East.

For baseball fans who find themselves listless from the never-ending barrage of steroids-related stories, here is a cornucopia of lists to bridge the gap from the Congressional hearings on Wednesday to — sound the trumpets — the first workouts on Thursday.

Five most significant offseason moves

(player division)

1. 3B Miguel Cabrera and LHP Dontrelle Willis to Detroit from Florida for six prospects, including blue-chippers Cameron Maybin and Andrew Miller. If Willis returns to form, this deal makes the Tigers the favorites in the rugged AL Central, which has seen four of its five teams make the playoffs in the last three years.

2. Mets trade four prospects for Minnesota LHP Johan Santana, then sign him to a six-year, $137 million extension. The Mets expended a lot of money and talent to try to put last year's epic collapse behind them.

3. RHP Dan Haren from Oakland to Arizona for six prospects. After surprisingly winning the NL West last year, the youth-laden D-backs became much more formidable with Haren's arrival.

4. LHP Erik Bedard from Baltimore to Seattle for five prospects, including OF Adam Jones. GM Bill Bavasi had better be right on this one, or it could cost the Mariners for years to come.

5. OF Delmon Young from Tampa Bay to Minnesota for RHP Matt Garza. A rare talent-for-talent trade of two blue-chip prospects that will be fascinating to watch unfold over the years.

Five most significant offseason moves (non-player division)

1. Joe Torre hired as Dodgers manager after his exit from the Yankees.

2. Joe Girardi beats out Don Mattingly to replace Torre as Yankees manager.

3. New manager John Russell and general manager Neal Huntington in Pittsburgh, hoping to bring the Pirates their first winning season since 1992. Or not.

4. After a year off to broadcast and accumulate a new toothpick supply, Dusty Baker is hired as Reds' manager.

5. The Braves begin their first season since 1990 without John Schuerholz as their GM, who retired and was replaced by Frank Wren.

Best timing of an offseason move

The Orioles began their long-overdue rebuilding campaign by sending shortstop Miguel Tejada to Houston for five prospects — the day before Tejada was named in the Mitchell Report.

Five comebacks to watch

1. Randy Johnson, Diamondbacks. At age 44, after just 10 starts in 2007, Johnson is coming off yet another back surgery. Does he have one more big year left in him, or is Mr. Snappy now Mr. Saggy?

2. Francisco Liriano, Twins. A successful comeback from Tommy John surgery could go a long way toward mitigating the loss of Santana.

3. Juan Gonzalez, Cardinals. Had one at-bat for Cleveland in 2005, and hasn't played since. At 38, it probably is the last go-round for the two-time MVP.

4. Hideo Nomo, Royals. Speaking of last go-rounds, Nomo hasn't pitched since 2005, when he was 5-8, 7.24 for Tampa Bay.

5. Rich Harden, A's. One of these years, he's going to stay healthy and win the Cy Young.

Best 1-2 pitching combos

1. Erik Bedard and Felix Hernandez, Mariners.

2. Brandon Webb and Dan Haren, Diamondbacks.

3. C.C. Sabathia and Fausto Carmona, Indians.

4. Josh Beckett and Daisuke Matsuzaka, Red Sox.

5. Jake Peavy and Chris Young, Padres.

But by June we might have to add this duo:

Tim Lincecum and Matt Cain, Giants.

Great year, but let's see them do it again

1. Carlos Pena, Rays (46 homers, 121 runs batted in).

2. Hideki Okajima, Red Sox (66 appearances, 2.22 ERA, .202 opponents' average).

3. Brandon Phillips, Reds (.288, 30 homers, 94 RBI).

4. Mike Lowell, Red Sox (.324, 21 homers, 120 RBI).

5. Aaron Rowand, Giants (.309, 27 homers, 89 RBI).

Five players who could still get traded

1. Joe Nathan, Twins. Just like Santana, he's entering the final year of his contract.

2. Joe Blanton, A's. Oakland is undergoing a massive rebuilding project, and Blanton could be next in line.

3. Brian Roberts, Orioles (see above).

4. Eric Chavez, A's (see above).

5. Coco Crisp, Red Sox. If Jacoby Ellsbury is as good as they think he is, Crisp becomes expendable.

Five players still unsigned

1. Sammy Sosa.

2. Kyle Lohse.

3. Corey Patterson.

4. Bartolo Colon.

5. Livan Hernandez.

Five ex-Mariners still unsigned

1. Jeff Weaver.

2. Ron Villone.

3. Jeff Cirillo.

4. Armando Benitez.

5. Freddy Garcia.

5 rookies to watch

1. Hiroki Kuroda, RHP, Dodgers. The Mariners went hard after Kuroda, but he decided SoCal was the place for him.

2. Ian Kennedy, RHP, Yankees. He gave a tantalizing glimpse of his potential in three 2007 starts, striking out 15 in 19 innings, with a 1.89 ERA.

3. Kosuke Fukodome, OF, Cubs. The most highly regarded outfielder from Japan since Hideki Matsui — or maybe Ichiro.

4. Jacoby Ellsbury, Red Sox. He hit .353 in September and was a star in the postseason, but retains his rookie status.

5. Evan Longoria, 3B, Rays. He'd be higher on the list but the Rays may start the monumentally talented Longoria at Class AAA, a la Milwaukee's Ryan Braun in 2006.

The only hypothetical name to match

Evan Longoria

Nicholas Sheridan

5 names to blissfully ignore when pitchers and catchers report

1. Brian McNamee

2. Kirk Radomski

3. Rusty Hardin

4. Henry Waxman

5. Jeff Novitzky

One accused user of performance-enhancing substances who definitely won't make the Hall of Fame

Debbie Clemens

Larry Stone: 206-464-3146 or lstone@seattletimes.com.